Scorpions Hold Protest, Concert Breaks Out

Protesting scorpions hold a sit-in on a box of Honey Nut Cheerios to protest the 'scorpiophagia' which they witnessed on the internet last night.









Violence erupted yesterday after the scorpions witnessed a brutal act of scorpiophagia, or scorpion eating, which they found on the internet last night. There were reports of riots in North Texas at this time. For a while, internet access was down at this location, so that is why this story is being sent late. Fortunately, the rumors of riots were incorrect.

“It is not enough that you want to tread on our defenseless bodies. Now you want to eat us.” This was the terse statement of the organization SAINT - Scorpions and Insects of North Texas – that was released shortly after 10 p.m. Central Standard Time.

The hedgehogs could not be reached for comment. They are attending a conference in Austin this weekend titled, ‘Living with Arthropods – Fulfilling the Dream.’






Comments from the crowd:


"I am so angry to hear that I was not invited to attend the conference with my colleagues! I promise that hedgehogs will roll! I am going to go and write a memorandum! A meeting will be scheduled!"










The scorpions allege that the video shows a man known as David Letterman eating a combination of cucumber slice and scorpion, along with some other unidentified substances. See the disgusting clip here.






A rabbit at the sit-in was heard to say that the scorpions have a point. "I wouldn't want to see someone eat rabbit stew. We have to see this incident from their perspective."













After a few shouted slogans, the scorpions were asked to sing a few songs. What followed was an hour of crowd-pleasing favorites, sung in Barber Shop Quartet style. A collection was taken at the end of the impromptu concert, and the crowd dispersed peacefully.

"I haven't heard such a good rendition of 'Free Bird' since I attended a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert in the 1970's," said Miss Pig, "tell my fans that I will be making another blog appearance later this week!"

Miss Pig has collaborated with Mr. Dadwithnoisykids on several occasions, especially when the subject has been odd things that happen at Mass. See them here and here.




























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