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Saturday, October 07, 2006

A Vast Right-Wing/Drumstick/Thigh Conspiracy

My wife just got home from shopping, and she got some fried chicken from a local place, and they make good chicken. Something struck me about the name, though, and so I went to work on some pictures I have of Pope Benedict XVI. Something seemed suspicious.

Within a few seconds, it hit me like a blow to the belly. It was obviously a vast radical Catholic conspiracy to control the world. Let me present the evidence.

This picture shows the name of the chicken store, Popeye’s. For most of us, Popeye is a cartoon character, a sailor, who is very muscular and gets a boost of strength from eating spinach whenever a crisis arises. He has a long-term relationship with a very skinny girlfriend, and there is a baby involved, although it is not clear whose child it is. But I digress.

Concentrate on the word Popeye’s. Note how the name could be broken into two words: POPE YES. The letters even turn a bit between the ‘e’ and the ‘y,’ making it even more believable.

This is not certain proof, but does corroborate with a picture of Pope Benedict XVI taken immediately after his election to the Papacy. Two things struck us as odd about this picture. Pay close attention to the area around the Pope’s right ear, and the coat of arms on the left side of the Pope’s alb.

Beyond his right ear, we did some technological modifications that are too complex for you common folk to understand, and by removing the darkness and adding in light, we came up with this interesting sight:

It appears that the Pope was using ‘Pope Yes’ brand ketchup or honey right before greeting the people in St. Peter’s Square on that fateful day.

Now direct your attention to the alb. By making the photograph bigger, and the area of concentration smaller, we noticed a certain pattern in the threads that make up the alb in this area.

This appears to be the President of the United States along with his wife. Need I say more? By controlling the fried chicken consumption in the United States, and who knows where else, the Church can influence the outcome of the Electoral College in the upcoming 2006 elections. The logic of this is flawless, and must be broadcast to the world.

You have been warned.


mommymiko said...

This is hilarious!

JeniR said...

Great stuff!! MMMM...CHICKEN!

Joee Blogs said...

I'll say it again, your blog ROCKS!

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