I invite you to sign The Manhattan Declaration

The Manhattan Declaration

Theodore's Memorial Video

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Funeral Arrangements, Part II

Theodore incorporated Divine Mercy into several pictures in his collection of picture books.

I have been too busy to write anything more profound than a schedule of events. Today is no different.


Yesterday we met with the funeral home to arrange for the viewing, the Mass, and the Cemetery arrangements. We are now tasked with coming up with 80-100 pictures to use in a video montage which would be displayed during the viewing. That works out to 6-7 pictures per year. After poring over boxes of pictures and the pictures on three computers, we have some selecting to do.


Neither Wifeofdadwithnoisykids or I are getting much sleep. We woke up early today and yesterday and went to the 8 a.m. Mass. Sleep doesnt' come easy either. I met a man recently who lost his son more than a year ago. He didn't appear to sleep much either.


Today we picked a cemetery plot for Theodore. My mind started to revolt during this event, as I kept on thinking that I should be doing this for my parents, not for my child.


As I drove out of the cemetery, I had to stop and put the car in 'park' while I experienced a meltdown of sorts. All I could think of was my little boy(even though he is bigger and taller than me) being buried in the ground. These waves of grief seem to come on with the least provocation, as when earlier today I went to carry Theodore's clothes to the car. I was taking them to the funeral home. I suddenly found myself sobbing, totally out of control. Like waves, they pass over me eventually.


I shall make one comment, and revise my first post on Theodore's death. Theodore was autistic and mentally retarded, and functioned at the maturity level of a toddler. As such, he was not capable of committing any sin any more than a toddler would be. But he had received the Sacraments: Baptism, Holy Communion, Confirmation, and Anointing of the Sick. Add onto these graces the many he would receive any time he received Our Lord at Mass, or those which came from praying with us. He was unique in the world of teenagers in that he still had all those graces intact in his soul when he died. In short, he died a holy death and went to Heaven - not stopping in Purgatory - after his death. So rather than pray for the repose of his soul, I would recommend instead that one consider the tremedous blessing we have received: knowledge that one of our children is in Heaven.


This is one consolation I have whenever I find myself reliving finding Theodore, trying to resuscitate him, and seeing him declared dead: without stain of sin, Heaven is now his home.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

St. Theodore pray for us.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful picture!

momwats8 said...

Amazing!! God Bless You all - we are still praying for you all during this difficult time.

Unknown said...

What a blessing that you're able to be so confident that he is in heaven. Some people really struggle with that. I pray that that knowledge will bring you peace and comfort.

May God bless your family.

Anonymous said...

I can only imagine what pain you and your family are experiencing. While you are so grateful and take comfort that your son is a Saint in Heaven, it still hurts.

I will lift you all up in my prayers.
God's peace be with you.

Anonymous said...

God Bless your family. My family offered up our Mass for you and we will keep you in our prayers and in our thoughts. Your cousin, Kathy

Sir Galen of Bristol said...

I am so sorry at this news. We'll certainly keep you in our prayers.

Anonymous said...

St. Theodore, indeed!

Jennifer in TX said...

We are praying for comfort for you as you mourn the loss of your precious son. He will be a powerful intercessor before our Lord for you all. We are praying our Rosary tonight for comfort, peace and for all your intentions.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your terrible loss but what comfort to know one of your precious children is already in Heaven...waiting for you! Thanks God!! Another thing I wanted to share with you is, on Friday at First Friday Mass I offered my Mass for Theodore and I felt a strong feeling like he was my friend in Heaven! It was amazing because it felt like the friendship of a child and then I read this post and I am sure that my feeling was correct. We have a dear saint to help us in Heaven! Deo Gracias!! God bless you and you're all in my prayers!!

Anonymous said...

We love Theodore and our whole family will miss him greatly!!! Theodore Gerard, pray for us, that we may hear what you heard on OUR last day.

Easter Almuena said...

dadwithnoisykids,
my teen bloggers, Cy and CT, have come to visit your blog, and we prayed for you during our evening prayers. Know that you and your family are lovingly remembered and prayed for. I also shared this with my husband. You and your wife, do take care now.
Love,
Easter

I entered your prayer request at One Came Back http://onecameback.blogspot.com/, a blog where its members enter prayer requests and pray for them. God bless!

Marie said...

I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child. But, I can say it was love that brought your beloved son into this world and it is to Love that your son has returned. The light he brought into your life has not withered out, no! For love is eternal.

Not absence nor even death can break the bonds of love. Your son is a precious part of your life a Gift for you and your wife from God. The price paid for such a Gift is a suffering so immense that one stands helpless before it....and those left must endure it one day at a time.

My heart goes out to you and your family & you shall remain in my prayers.

Peace to you & your lovely family

Marie

joannaB73 said...

I think even people who don't know you and your family, like myself, would be touched by your son. God Bless.

ashley said...

The dadwithnoisykids family is in my prayers. God bless you all.

Mulier Fortis said...

Praying for you all at this difficult time.

X said...

Prayers going up for you and your family.

EC Gefroh said...

I am so sorry for you loss. Your family is in my prayers.

KC said...

Praying for you all.

UNUL DINTRE NOI said...

Christ is Risen!

Dear Beautiful Catholic Family,

It is somewhere in February that I discovered your blog. It was a joy and I was amaized: the largest families I know had "just" 5 children. So, after a while I've passed again, to see the last post about the sudden death of Theodore. I was shocked!
But I find really beautiful the conclusion/certitude about Theodore beeing in Heaven! I think you are right. Well, we, me and the oldest group of children at "Sacre Coeur" in Bucharest, Romania, will keep your family in our prayers.

May Our Lady help you in this time.
Ana Daniela

Anonymous said...

As, I don't know you or your family but am only a visitor to your blog, I am glad that you posted the video's of Theodore! When I told my kids that dadwithnoisykids had lost a son, they were upset. The video's have helped us put a face to this young man.
Your tremendous grief over your loss makes me so sad. We will continue to pray for your family and especially for consolation from God.
I'm sure St. Theodore can hardly wait to see the noisykid gang again someday!!!
God bless,
Patricia

Matthew S said...

God bless you, Prayers for you and your family in this time. May your little saint watch over you and intercede for you daily.

Having just had miscarriage I had a thought, won't it be wonderful when, God willing, we can enter into heaven and be greeted by our children that preceeded us?

Under the Mercy,

Matthew S

Anonymous said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. I pray that God will bless and comfort you and give you his peace.

Eternal rest grant unto your precious son and may he rest in peace, Amen.

Anonymous said...

In short, he died a holy death and went to Heaven - not stopping in Purgatory - after his death. So rather than pray for the repose of his soul, I would recommend instead that one consider the tremedous blessing we have received: knowledge that one of our children is in Heaven.

The Divine as truly spoken to you:

As our Lord has promised us that the home which reveres His Sacred Heart will be especially blessed
One of the greatest benefits gained from a constant devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus is the genuine comfort felt in time of sorrow. Most families, at one time or another, are asked to accept a heavy cross -some, more than one. In the case of the death of a parcel, the Divine Friend will lie there to provide security. At the death of a child, the Divine rather is there to explain to the parents that their child is already safe in his heavenly home. . If a child is born defective, the Divine Physician will prescribe the necessary graces to carry the cross from day to day. If a child is mentally retarded, the Divine Teacher will inspire the patience necessary to accept and assist the one whom God may have chosen for a life of perpetual mental and spiritual childhood.

The Divine Guest will bless abundantly those who enthrone Him and will assist them when help is most needed. The child who learns to turn to his Divine Friend when he is confused will have learned a valuable lesson for life.

God Bless

PBXVI said...

My prayers are for your family during this difficult time! Praise Jesus there is one more beautiful soul in Heaven now! I know it is very hard, and so I will pray for all of you! Keep courage!

God Bless!

Lisa said...

I'm so sad to have found your wonderful family in the world of blogs at this hard time. But, please know that we are praying to St. Theodore for all of you. It's a difficult blessing.

Our Lady of the Mysterious Decapitation

Our Lady of the Mysterious Decapitation
Now restored with the help of some cement!

Prayer to Our Lady of the Mysterious Decapitation

Mary my mother, take my hand today, and all days.
Lead me away from all occasions of sin.
Guide me in fulfilling your last words in the Gospel,
"Do whatever He tells you."
Amen.

I am An Amateur Catholic Blogger!

Amateur Catholic B-Team Member