This is one of the hardest posts to write.
Wifeofdadwithnoisykids has had some bleeding for the past few weeks, and noticed some other signs that suggested that the pregnancy was not going well. I noticed it as well, but I kept reassuring her that 'maybe this time she doesn't have to spend the first trimester throwing up.'
She made an appointment to see the obstetrician yesterday, and I was blessed to get done with work in time to go with her. So I was with Wifeofdadwithnoisykids when the ultrasound technician told her that she could not see any heartbeat.
Wifeofdadwithnoisykids has had some bleeding for the past few weeks, and noticed some other signs that suggested that the pregnancy was not going well. I noticed it as well, but I kept reassuring her that 'maybe this time she doesn't have to spend the first trimester throwing up.'
She made an appointment to see the obstetrician yesterday, and I was blessed to get done with work in time to go with her. So I was with Wifeofdadwithnoisykids when the ultrasound technician told her that she could not see any heartbeat.
Eternal God, in Whom mercy is endless
and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible,
look kindly upon us and increase your mercy in us,
so that in difficult moments we might not despair
nor become despondent,
but with great confidence submit ourselves
to Your Holy Will,
Which is Love and Mercy Itself.
Amen.
It is hard to understand the Will of God right now. We keep repeating the prayer that ends the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, especially the part about God's Will being 'Love and Mercy Itself.' There are many things I have read that show me how tremendous and wonderful God’s Mercy is – like the Carmelite Sisters of Compeigne singing as they climb the scaffold and approach the guillotine. But I am not as docile and obedient a servant as they were, and the slightest cross chafes me.
In the meantime, we have named our little child Therese Mary Catherine. Therese in honor of the Little Flower, Mary in honor of the Blessed Mother, and Catherine after St. Catherine of Siena. My beloved wife was due on St. Catherine’s Feast Day, April 29. In addition, St. Catherine was one of the youngest of a large family – 25 children total – so we feel a great love for her not only as a Saint but also as a child who only came into being through the generosity of God and her parents.
Each child is precious to us, even one who only exists for seven weeks. While our living children are a source of consolation for us, they are also a reminder that there will be one less child seated at our table, one less voice calling in the middle of the night, one less hug and kiss throughout the day, and one less child growing into adulthood and ultimately Heaven.
The title of this blog comes from a beautiful song by Marie Bellet, called Thy Will Be Done, which she wrote after having a miscarriage.
It is hard to understand the Will of God right now. We keep repeating the prayer that ends the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, especially the part about God's Will being 'Love and Mercy Itself.' There are many things I have read that show me how tremendous and wonderful God’s Mercy is – like the Carmelite Sisters of Compeigne singing as they climb the scaffold and approach the guillotine. But I am not as docile and obedient a servant as they were, and the slightest cross chafes me.
In the meantime, we have named our little child Therese Mary Catherine. Therese in honor of the Little Flower, Mary in honor of the Blessed Mother, and Catherine after St. Catherine of Siena. My beloved wife was due on St. Catherine’s Feast Day, April 29. In addition, St. Catherine was one of the youngest of a large family – 25 children total – so we feel a great love for her not only as a Saint but also as a child who only came into being through the generosity of God and her parents.
Each child is precious to us, even one who only exists for seven weeks. While our living children are a source of consolation for us, they are also a reminder that there will be one less child seated at our table, one less voice calling in the middle of the night, one less hug and kiss throughout the day, and one less child growing into adulthood and ultimately Heaven.
The title of this blog comes from a beautiful song by Marie Bellet, called Thy Will Be Done, which she wrote after having a miscarriage.
22 comments:
May our Lord Jesus comfort you all during this time. I know we were all looking forward to seeing and holding this new little baby. May our Lord Jesus keep your child in his hands and may our Blessed Mother love her. We are praying for all of you. Please please let us know if we can do anything else we can do for you. Our hearts ache with yours.
Saint Therese, pray for us.
Blessed Mother, pray for us.
Saint Catherine, pray for us.
I'm so sorry to hear this. We'll be keeping all of you in our prayers.
Alicia
parentsofnoisykids,
You are certainly in our prayers. And I know you know this, but Therese Mary Catherine is up there praying for you too.
God bless you...all of you!
Your family will be in our prayers also.
God bless you and comfort your whole family in this sad time.
this happened to me with my last pregnancy no 12. i needed surgery & ended up in intensive care & nearly died.We named our child Sophie Maria..i love your beautiful choice of names..i had experienced intermittant bleeding for the first time & strangely i was 'over-sick' suggesting something was wrong. With my first miscarriage when my husband saw the 9 week scan with no heartbeat he burst into tears. i feel for you all..it is really tough..God's will be done..look after yourselves...
You're in my prayers ... as always.
Brother, I was so sorry to hear this news. This must be a difficult time for you.
Please be assured of our prayers for you all.
In His love, always,
James
I am sorry to hear this news.
Our family will pray for you, your wife, your daughter and your entire family in our Rosary tonight.
Although losing a child is one of the hardest sorrows to bear, I pray you meet her again, sweet Therese Mary Catherine. I love all three of these Saints. You are in our prayers.
My heart goes out to you. 22 years ago I lost my second son shortly after his birth. No one can feel you pain right now, but FWIW I'll have you in my prayers tonight.
My wife and I lost two children early in our marriage and so my heart goes out to you. I pray that one day your family will be re-united in Heaven with little Therese Mary Catherine.
In paradisum
In paradisum deducant te angeli:
in tuo adventu suscipiant te martyres,
et perducant te in civitatem sanctam Jerusalem.
May the Angels conduct you to Paradise: And at your coming may the Martyrs receive you. May they lead you to the holy City of Jerusalem.
Chorus angelorum te suscipiat, et cum Lazaro quondam paupere aeternam habeas requiem.
May a choir of Angels receive you. And may you, with Larzarus once a poor man possess eternal peace.
Having just gone through this myself a few months ago (and having just passed the due date), I understand what you're going through. You'll all be in our prayers.
I am so sorry. All of you, including little Therese, are in my prayers.
I'm sorry for your losss, your family
will be in my prayers.
God bless you all.
Holy Mother, pray for us.
I am soo sorry for your loss!!! Praying for you both and your family during this trying time.
I'm genuinely very sorry to hear of that sad news.
Your baby will be praying for you all I'm sure
God Bless
-x-
You and your family are in my prayers. I'm so sorry for your loss. : (
May the angels welcome heaven's newest intercessor. May our Blessed Sorrowful Mother give you comfort. I'm so sorry for your loss.
So sorry to hear your news. Our hearts go out to you. So hard when you are so excited about a new little life and meeting her soon. We had a miscarriage before this last pregnancy. I think it was hardest on my husband... and then the terrible fear when we found out we were pregnant again two months later, as to whether this one would survive. She did and is a healthy little 2.5 week old newborn now.
Just after the miscarriage, Doug, my hubbie said as he prayed his rosary on the way home from work, that he actually felt little Pio's presence in the car with him. He was so touched by knowing that we will meet him one day.
God bless you,
I'm very sorry for your sad loss and will remember your family in my prayers.
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