Such is our case with having more children. Our youngest living child is two and a half years old, and we lost Therese in October of 2007. This should have been the point in our lives where wifeofdadwithnoisykids would be very uncomfortable, but instead we feel a sense of loss and emptiness. A few grams of 'product of conception' still have the strength to break a mother and father's hearts - even months after leaving us.
Words of consolation are hard to find, especially when people remind us of the blessings we do have in our living children. But like the lost sheep out of one hundred, we feel the loss of each child who has left us. I try to help my wife as well. I remind her that I did not marry her to have a whole bunch children; that the fruit of our union was just an added blessing to our marriage. She replied that WAS why she married me, and I seem to be failing her. She was kidding, of course. She married me for my charm and my qualities as excellent 'arm candy.'
Even our children's prayers cry out to God. Recently, Noisykid #8 prayed for Mom to 'get that pregnancy test right.'
At this point, actions must be joined with our prayers. No, I am not suggesting anything which would go against the law of God. No animal husbandry techniques for humans here! And no need for the 'little blue pill' which was approved by the FDA ten years ago today.
No, there are other things which can be done to get God's attention. Let me elaborate.
1. From now on, I'm going to live as if there were no more children coming down the pike.
2. I'm going to buy a two-seat sports car - just room for me and my wife.
3. It's time we travel a bit. There are cruises put on by Catholic apologetics groups, and we would love to go on a cruise - once again, just the two of us.
4. Rome. Need I say more?
5. Time to buy a big tract of woodland in East Texas and start that ranch I've always wanted.
6. Take up some expensive hobby.
7. Write the book 'Cheaper by the Dozen - Not!'
8. In short, I shall try to become the most self-centered son-of-a-gun possible; where only the Grace of God and a set of twins could save me from this road to perdition.
*****
Speaking of roads, right now I am traveling toward Houston to visit friends.
When I am not tapping away at my Blackberry's little keyboard, I am praying for the repose of the soul of a young woman I never met who died on a highway up in Michigan last night. The loss that her family is experiencing is one I can't imagine.
Yes, I have MOST of the Noisykids and my wife with me.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
10 comments:
Buy a non-refundable ticket to fly to Rome 10 months from now. That's my advice!
I'll keep y'all in my prayers! ; )
Ha ha ha...
I hope you will consider doing the the meme you are tagged for at my other blog A Tribute to Our Priests:
http://atributetoourpriests.blogspot.com/
It sounds fun and look forward to reading your answers. :-)
It's a very difficult stage in life..but your wife is much younger than me & my aunts had their last children when they were 45..perhaps andrew & I might come back from holiday with something extra!!
I feel your pain but know that God is good. Our little one is 2 1/2 and I have lost three babies in a row since I had her. I kept feeling as if I would never have a baby again. I am now almost 8 weeks pregnant. I must say I am thrilled and terrified. I do not want to lose another baby....I will offer up all of my sufferings for you and your beautiful wife. God is good. I will keep on praying.
Yeah, it was hard when my wife and i just miscarried a few months ago. I will say this, buy the tickets to rome about 10 months out.
I have a question for you? How many miscarriages would be a sign for you to say that your time is over for having more children? I have a friend who has 7 children and then had 3 miscarriages in her early 40's. Finally her husband and her decided that they would use NFP to avoid conception since it seemed apparent that she could no longer carry a child to term. It was a difficult decision to make but it seemed to be very sensible. Repeated miscarriages are difficult on the mom both physically and emotionally.
Anonymous:
I shall answer your question with another blog entry this week. Good question. Thanks for asking it.
God bless all of you and have a blessed Divine Mercy Sunday.
we are praying too, for that beautiful young women that died on that michigan roadway. she was home-schooled and i am betting that her mom is thankful for all of the wonderful hours she spent with her daughter at home that would have otherwise been spent away from her at school. eternal rest grant to her o Lord ...
I just found your blog. How refreshing and cool.
We have 3 kids and a miscarried angel in heaven. My problem is a husband who is not interested in pursing more children. We are both 42 and it leaves me heartbroken that he is not interested in trying. We don't use contraception at all. We don't even need to use NFP as 'it' barely happens anymore.
I tried the becoming self centered just recently :-) ...nothing?
Anyway, it makes me so sad. He is such a fabulous husband and father, which is why I want more children...because our family shares so much love. I wish he'd see it that way. It all leaves me heartbroken.
We are Catholic. One of our kids has special needs and to be honest, I think my dh is afraid of that happening again, though I am not.
~Peace,
(and here's to another one for you!)
Rachel
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